The Primate 1

The Primate One – Part 1 (The Call)

It is midnight with a full moon. Two officers are talking inside the Central America Asylum for Dangerous Animals (CAADA). The first officer says, “You have no idea what you are doing letting this prisoner run free.” The second officer replies,  “He has already served five years in here, so it is time to let him go.”

The officers go down to the solitary confinement level, to cell number 4, and slides open the small window and says, “Prisoner 2258, you have been pardoned and are free to go.” Hangy says,  “Good! This place smells like rotten eggs.” The first officer says, “Now go before he changes his mind!”

Hangy walks out of the building and across the street he sees a lamp post with a sign attached. The sign reads, “SPECIAL OPPORTUNITY – Become an Astronaut – Become a hero to the world. Apply at the Costa Rica Space Center (CRSC). No experience required. Bring no weapons.” 

The next day at the Costa Rica Space Center, a small monkey stands by the entrance, next to a frog.  The monkey says, “Hi, I am Wingy, what is your name?” The frog replies, “I am Smorgas, are you here to be an astronaut too?” Wingy says, “Yeah, but I already have some experience in flying from the military, so at least I have a chance.” Smorgas  says, “You are lucky. I come from the field of science. I am a biologist and geneticist, specializing is unidentified creatures, but I do not believe in space aliens. I think that is too much.”

Wingy and Smorgas walked toward the entrance to the CRSC,  and looked at the line of applicants ahead of  them. Wingy and Smorgas went inside, and several applicants came back out and almost all of them were sobbing.

Wingy said,  “Wow, we are doomed, it must be hard.”

Just then a loudspeaker voice boomed, “Attention. Hangy, Wingy, Smorgas, and Renna, report to the testing room.” Wingy and Smorgus walked in and followed directions to the testing room. They went in and saw two other monkeys walk in. Then the door closed behind them and it was completely dark!

The loud speaker voice said, “This final test will be very dangerous and will find out if the four of you can work as a team. Now, you have to face the Destroyer.” When the light came back on, the three monkeys and the frog saw a large robot with gleaming red eyes.  Suddenly, Renna pulls out a steak knife ad throws it at the robot’s foot and it topples over.

Renna said,  “its just silverware, not a weapon.” Hangy said, “Great job, but who are you?”

“Obviously, the smartest one here! My name is Renna. Remember it!” Smorgas said,  “if you guys will pin down the robot, I can disable it and reprogram it.” Renna looked a little angry and said, “I am not a guy, thank you very much.” “Oops, sorry” said Smorgas. Then Wingy said,  “if you can re-program it, I can drive it.” And Hangy said,  “I’ll pin it down.”

Hangy leapt onto the robot and pinned it down and Smorgas quickly reprograms it to obey Wingy’s orders. As a test, Wingy said,  “Robot, run into that wall at full speed!” The robot jumps up and runs into the wall and makes a big hole. The loudspeaker voice says, “You four are the first ones to pass the teamwork test. Congratulations, you are now astronauts and will be the crew on Primate One.”

The Primate One – Part  2 (Alpha Python)

Meanwhile, it is near midnight and several people are crowded around a console at the CRSC hanger. An assistant says: “Check-ups on the Primate ships 1-5 are complete, Dr. Wining. The person in charge says, “Did you lock down the hanger?” The assistant looked guilty and replied, “Oh no, Dr. Wining, I forgot!” Just then a grenade flies into the hanger and Dr. Wining yells, “Get down!” The grenade explodes and smoke filled the room! Dr. Wining and his assistant opened their eyes and saw a coiled up snake in the middle of all the damage and fire.

Dr. Wining brushes himself off and says,  “Alpha Python, we meet again!” The snake replies, “You have failed, Wining! These ships do not belong to you anymore.” At that, Dr. Wining got up and ran toward the snake, but he hears Alpha Python say, “Pathetic!  Say hello to more of my amigos.” Dr. wingy looks over and three more snakes slithered into the hanger and got into Primates 5, 4, and 3.  The assistant sees them and runs to the door and seals it so that more snakes cannot get in.

Dr. Winging said, “Alpha Python, you are not going anywhere. I alone have the keys needed to start the Primate ships.” But Alpha Python laughs and says, “Oh, you mean these keys. I found them on the floor after you dove away from the grenade blast.” Dr. Winning can only watch as the snake slithers up the boarding ramp to Primate 2 with the keys held by his tail.

The Primates 2,3,4 and five take off. Dr. Wining and his assistant are left with only Primate 1.

Two weeks later a group gathers at the damaged hanger. Wingy says, “Dr. Wining, so that is why you need us. But what is that sound?” They all look over at Renna who is loudly chewing her gum. Renna says,  “You lost me when you were doing check-ups of the primate 1 ship. I got bored” Wingy said,  “Renna, did you hear the part about us launching today?” Renna now interested says, “What, we are launching?” Hangy jumps in, “Finally some excitement from this day!” But Smorgas looking unhappy says, “Dr. Wining said, , I am not sure I trust you.”

“Nonsense” Dr. Wining replied, “ Hey, do you guys want to see your space suits?”

The group goes over to a wall with space suits hanging on hooks. Wingy, Hangy, Renna and Smorgas all begin to try on helmets. But Smorgas struggles to put on his helmet and says, “Can you guys see any thing out of your helmet?” They all laugh and Hangy says, “Smorgas, you have it on backwards!”

The four team members put on their space suits and head for the space ship. As they walk, they hear Dr. Wining’s voice in their helmet speakers saying, “Your mission will be challenging. You will need to attack the snake mothership and come back Primate ships 2,3,4,  along with Primate 1 and sabotage Primate 5 to explode.  You can find them because there is a tracking device on all of them. Do not stop fighting until you have won. I am counting on you to bring down the snakes once and for all!”

The Primate 1 blasts off into space with the four new astronauts on board. Smorgas says,  “Did you notice that Dr. Wining did not give us any special weapons; so I made some substitutions. Since I am 100% smarter that Dr. Wining, you can trust my weapons will not be faulty like this space ship.” But Wingy disagrees and says,  “I think she is a beauty.”

Smorgas ignores him and says, “That reminds me, Wingy here is your gift. I made you some weaponized drones that you can control from a wrist gauntlet. They will all fit on your belt.”  Renna, I am giving you a knife with a holographic blade that will extend with a just a flick of your wrist and go where-ever you want it to with 100% accuracy. And Hangy, I am giving you a kinetic energy suit that will reflect back any punch or force that strikes you.”

After a while, our heroes see the snake mother ship coming into view, above their ship.

Wingy said, “Renna and Hangy use jet packs and spacewalk to fight the snakes on the Mothership. Smorgas and I will stay and guard primate 1.” Renna and Hangy exit Primate 1 and space walk to outside the mothership.

Renna says,  “The sign on this door reads, Access Denied. But not for long.” She throws her knife at the door handle and the door flies open. The room is filled with snakes! Hangy says,  “Doesn’t look like they want to play nice.”  Renna replies, “Agreed.” A snake slithers toward Hangy and bites him on the arm, but on his new kinetic suit. There were not any holes! The snake looks surprised and says,“So you are the thugs the CRSC sent to take back our ships.”

Hangy said,  “Ok snake, who is your leader?”  The snake says, “His name is……………..”  


Meanwhile, Wingy and Smorgas are still back on Primate 1. The entry door quietly opens and a snake slithers inside. …………suspense………..

Back in the mother ship,  Hangy and Renna confront the snakes. Renna yells, “Spit it out! What is his name?” Hangy quietly asks again, “If you won’t tell me your leaders name, I will have to ask one of your friends over there and I won’t be half as nice!” The snake gives up and says, “OK, his name is Alpha Python! But you will never guess where he is.” Renna, still angry asks, “Where is he?”   But there was no answer.

However, back on Primate 1, the snake is sneaking up behind Wingy and Smorgas, and speaks, “Hello, amigos. Do you want to dance?” And they hear a loud “HHIIIIISSSSSSS.”


The Primate One – Part 3 (The Mothership)

Back in Primate 1, Wingy and Smorgas are confronted by a large snake. Wingy says, “Who are you?” The snake replies with a hiss, “Your doom!” Smorgas said,  “maybe not! I was just thinking the same thing.” Wingy glances at his wrist controlled drones and yells, “Drones attack!” Immediately, the drones fly into Alpha Python’s face, but he easily smashes one with his tail and then swats away the rest. The large snake says, “I am Alpha Python and, too bad, I have seen this technology before. Amigos, capture them.” Suddenly five other snakes show up and spring on Wingy and Smorgas and wrap and coil around them! They then take them back to the mothership.

Back at the snake’s mothership Renna and Hangy are still in the room where they interrogated the snakes. Renna tells Hangy, “If I can get to the main console of the mother ship, I can sabotage it with my knife so it will crash after we get off. We can then get back to Primate 1 where Wingy and Smorgas are. Then we can get out of here.”

Hangy said,  ”I like it.”

Snake 1 says, “You think you can get on our mother ship without getting my attention”

Renna throws her knife at the snake and knocks it out and says, “Sweet dreams.” Then Renna and Hangy make it to the console room but they find Wingy and Smorgas tied up to chairs and Alpha Python emerges. Alpha Python then holds up a bomb and attaches it to Wingy’s chair.

The big snake says, “Time is ticking!” Hangy says,  “You may have a bomb, but we have a plan that your two brain cells can’t handle.” Renna says, “Yep, you snakes have tiny brains.” Alpha Python grins and says, “No smaller than yours, I presume.”  While the two are mocking each other, Hangy runs to the chair and yells back, “Renna, pass me your knife.” Quickly Renna throws the knife to Hangy and he slices off the chair leg with the bomb attached. He throws it at the control panel for the mother ship. KABOOM!!

Alpha Python yells, “You idiots. Now we will all die!” The mothership spins out of control and crash lands on a deserted planet VH31. When the smoke clears, Wingy, Smorgas, Renna, and Hangy stumble out of the wreckage of the space ship.  They see Alpha Python slithering slowly around the wreckage along with a few of his snake amigos. Wingy says, “Let’s see if the Primate 1 survived the crash. It was in the mother ship’s hanger.” They find the hanger, but the engines on the Primate 1 are damaged. Hangy says, “The Primate 1 isn’t going anywhere.” As Smorgas stares at the wreckage of a CRSC space ship he says, “You guys won’t believe what I found.”

Wingy calls out to Alpha Python and says, “If we all work together maybe we can find a way off this rock.” Alpha Python realizes Wingy is right and says, “OK.” Then Renna stares at the big snake and says, “OK, but I still think snakes have tiny brains.” Changing the subject, Wingy says, “Do think there is any food in that wreckage?” Alpha Python  Good idea, let’s go see for ourselves if there is any food there.” And, they all begin to comb through the wreckage. Soon Hangy says, “I think I found some food,” Before the group can go over to see what Hangy found,

Wingy calls out, “Wait, everyone come here. I think I found the jackpot!” When Hangy gets there, he says, “What, a fully functional long range hologram projector!” Alpha Python says, “Do you want to know why we hate the CRSC so much? Just replay the last message.” Wingy starts the projector and Dr. Wining’s image appears. Dr. Wining begins to speak, “Technology is a marvel. Whoever has it, has power! That is what I want. Unfortunately, the best technology is in the hands of the snakes (no pun intended, ha, ha) and they only use it for goody two shoes reasons. Pathetic! I want it and I will get it at all costs. ………..suspense………..

FLASH-BACK to two weeks earlier

A grenade lands and Alpha Python yells, “Get Down!” As the dust settles, Alpha Python opens his eyes and sees Dr. Wining  and realizes that Wining must have thrown the grenade and the CRSC was there to attack Alpha Python and his amigos. Alpha Python slithers toward Dr. Wining who says,“Pathetic.” Then Dr. Wining knocked out Alpha Python and steals Primate 1 and he takes off for parts unknown.

The Primate One – Part 4  Back to the present time: (The Traitor)

Back at the CRSC (Costa Rica Space Center) space ship on a deserted planet Alpha python explains what really happened and the group now knows that Dr. Wining had knocked out Alpha Python and stolen Primate 1. But they did not know where he went. Hangy says, “Alpha Python, that’s horrible!” Alpha Python replies, “The past is the past and we can’t change that.” Then Wingy says, “OK, let’s take down the CRSC, once and for all.” Renna says, “I hate to remind you guys but we are still stranded here.” Meanwhile, Smorgas is looking at the hologram projector, and says, “Then we ask for help.” Alpha Python says, “I have some amigos out there who would be willing to help us.” And Wingy agrees saying, “Then let’s do it, whatever it takes.”

Meanwhile back at CRSC headquarters, an assistant to Dr. wining says, “There is a message that we have intercepted from the missing ship.” Dr. Wining says, “Play it, now!”

Wingy’s Image appears on a hologram screen and Dr. Wining hears him say, “Friends of Alpha Python. We are stranded on the deserted planet VH38 and we need your help, so that we can take down the vain and corrupt CRSC once and for all.” Dr. Wining screams, “FIND THEM, NOW!”

Back on the small planet VH38,  Alpha Python’s friends arrive to help. They bring tools to fix Primate 1 space ship.

One of Alpha Python’s amigos says, “Glad we are of assistance” Alpha Python says, “Thank you all. The CRSC won’t last much longer. Oh, Wingy, I want to show you something.” Alpha Python takes Wingy to a nearby cave. When there, Alpha Python says, “Us snakes stashed something away for safe keeping. We have the Primates 2,3,4 and 5 here and they are in working condition. We can use them for a fleet with a new mothership. We can rebuild Primate 1 into a mothership. with parts from our mothership.”

Suddenly, the cave rumbles! A grenade drops. There is one word painted on it….CRSC! Wingy notices that the grenade has a slow fuse. Wingy says to Alpha Python, “You fly Primate 2 out of here and I’ll fly Primate three. We can attach Primates 4 and take it with us before it blows. We will leave Primate 5 to blow-up.”

They quickly fly the four Primate ships out of the cave. Then…….KABOOM!

In the Meantime, the amigos have been converting Primate 1 into a mother ship, using parts of the original. The Mother ship will also be named Primate 1.

Suddenly a CRSC ship appears. The cabin door opens and Dr. Wining walks out and says, “I want Hangy!” Hangy says, “Come and get me.” Dr. Wining says, “I knew you would be part of this rebellion! It is hard to believe that you would betray us again after only five years in solitary confinement.” Hangy said,  “That didn’t crush my spirit, you can’t either.” Dr. Wining replies,  “And why is that?” Then Hangy points to the sky and says, “Because we have….THEM!” Just then Primates 2,3,4, and 5 fly out of the cave!

Dr. Wining yells, “Impossible!” Just then,Alpha Python slithers out of Primate 2 and says, “Anything is possible, Wining.” Shocked, Dr. Wining says,  “You!” Alpha Python says, “Did you miss me?” Then Renna laughs, “ I guess the CRSC has tiny brains.” As Dr. Wining puts his hands up, a bomb shoots out of the CRSC ship. Dr. Wining laughs and says, “The population crusher, Snake Tech. I believe it is your design, Alpha Python.” Hangy says, Now I don’t know who to trust anymore.” Dr. Wining counts down, “Three-Two-one.” Then…..  KABOOM, the bomb explodes somewhere in the distance and rubble goes flying up into the sky.

Dr. Wining says, “That’s my que!” and takes off in the CRSC space ship.

Turning to the group, Alpha Python asks, “How is our mother ship coming along. We don’t have much time.” They see rubble flying toward them and Wingy yells, “RUN! Get in one of the Primate ships while there is still time.” Renna yells, “Yeah, but not much. So get moving slowpokes.” Just then, a piece of rubble shoots down and destroys Primate 5.

Wingy says,  “Oh no. Amigo, how much longer is that mother ship going to take?” The amigo replies, “Not much longer.” Another piece of rubble destroys Primate 4.

Amigo says, “I am almost……………..” Before he can finish, the primate 3 gets destroyed! Almost……….” He starts but then, Primate 2 gets destroyed. “DONE, let’s get out of here.” Everyone jumps into Primate 1, the mothership, which is the only one left, and it takes off.

As they depart, Hangy says,  “I have to tell you all something. I knew about the CRSC, being the way it is. I was always on the snake’s side and I thought I could steal Primate and give it back to them. But then I realized that you guys were good and that you needed to know that the CRSC was bad. So, I stole a hologram projector from Dr. Wining and left it in the ruins of the CRSC ship for you to find.” Wingy said,  “What? You knew all along?“ Hangy said, “ I betrayed the CRSC before. I guess it is time to do it again.”

The Primate One – Part  5  (The spy)

Meanwhile, on Primate 1, the new mothership, the team is planning their next move. Dr. Wining has destroyed the other primate space ships and the team is going after him to try to bring down the CRSC.  Smorgas says,  “Lets hit the CRSC where it really hurts. Its head base.” Alpha Python asks, “On what planet?” …………………..suspense……….

“Earth!” says Wingy. “We are coming up on Costa Rica.” Renna says, “Its good to be back.” As the approach CRSC headquarters, Alpha Python says, “I want to blow the doors straight off the building.” Hangy said,  “Be my guest.” KABOOM! The team gets out of the Primate 1 mothership and heads for the open doorway. When they step inside they see………….A robot with gleaming eyes! Wingy says, “Impossible. I destroyed that thing.” Smorgas says, “You might still have control of it.” Looking at the robot, Wingy says,  “Robot, Power down.” But it keeps coming and kicks Wingy back out of the doorway. Smorgas says,  “I guess we will have to use the brute force tactic.” Renna says,  “Allow me.” She throws her knife at the robot but it catches the knife and throws it back at her. Wingy walks back through the doorway and says, “Is it just me or is it smarter than it was last time?”

They hear Dr. Wining say, “Definitely!” Hangy says, “It’s you!” Dr, Wining grins and says, “It is stronger, and faster, and, as I just said, more intelligent. And, there is no reprogram button. So, you are stuck.” Wingy looks arouns and asks, “I know, but where is Renna?”

Renna has found the CRSC arsenal and says, “ Wow, this place is huge.” She walks over to a shelf with a sign: GRENADES. Renna grabs a leather bag from the shelf and stuffs grenades inside the bag. Then she puts on a CRSC uniform, and walks out undetected. As she is walking away, a scientist sees Renna in a uniform with the name tag WENDY. He asks, “Hey Wendy, did you hear that they are putting on a full scale search for the crew of Primate 1?  The rumor is that they teamed up with Alpha Python.” Renna just smiles and keeps walking.

Meanwhile, Wingy and Dr. Wining are facing off. Dr. Wining says, “This is the end, Wingy.” And the robot runs forward Wingy, but suddenly stops. They all hear a beeping.  Then, KABOOM! And, the robot is blown to smithereens and the explosion knocks down the team and Dr. Wining.  Renna walks toward them and says, “The CRSC is weak and you are weak too, Wingy. I was always meant to be the one in control. My brother stole all of the thunder. But no more. My brother was always the favorite child, but no one cared about me. You have all been lied to. I have fooled you all. My name isn’t Renna.” She pulls off her blond wig to reveal greasy black hair and says, “It is time I introduced myself properly. The name is Nartha! Nice to meet you.”

Wingy and Dr. Wining yell at the same time: “WWWHHHAAATTT!!!”

Then, Nartha begins to throw more grenades into each part of the CSRS headquarters and they can all hear her maniacal laughter.  Dr. Wining and the rest of the CRSC staff flee to their own mothership and our heroes run to the Primate 1.  Wingy hears Nartha yell, “Wingy, wherever you go, I will always find you. Afterall, I am the first universal booksailor.”

The Primate 1 lifts off and picks up speed.

Meantime, on the CRSC mothership, Dr. Wining is angry because Primate 1 brought Nartha to CSRC headquarters. He plots a course to intercept and destroy Primate 1 and its crew. Dr. Wining says “We lost our base to those maniacs and now our entire staff is cramped up in the mothership. They may be our biggest enemy yet. We must destroy them so that CRSC can flourish again.”

Over on Primate 1, Smorgas says,  “Where do we go now?” Wingy replies, “Wherever we go, the CRSC will find us.” Hangy said,  “I am still thinking about what Nartha said, that she will be able to find us wherever we go. Maybe she is the one we should be afraid of?” Smorgas says,  “I may understand now. It is a rough theory, but the most likely one we have. Nartha mentioned the booksailors. Right? I know who they are, or they were. Myth says that each booksailor has received a magic purple library card that can be used to bend reality, to time travel, and visit their favorite books. Unfortunately, an Artificial Intelligence called Caution Prime wiped out the booksailors and stole their magic purple library cards. But a couple of weeks ago, a scientist by the name of Piggy, founder and CEO of Pigtech and an honorary member of the breakfast league, invented what he called the Unisailor Card. This new card allows you to travel through time and space and theoretically into different dimensions. It is reported that one of the two Unisailor cards was stolen and maybe Nartha took it.”

Just then, on Primate 1, a hologram begins to play.

Dr. Wining image appears and says, “My ship is currently in front of yours. This message is just in case you have any last words. I would like to hear them.” Alpha Python says, “I recommend you should say yours!” Dr. Wining’s hologram says, “Do you think you have a chance of defeating me. I smashed your entire snake tech empire like a piece of glass.” Alpha Python replies, “That is why you will lose. Your tactics are too brutal and brutality never wins a fight in the end. It is won by brave men and women who know what is right; unlike you Wining!” Dr. Wining’s hologram says, “I may not know what is right, but I do know what is wrong; the fact that you are still alive. Goodbye!” The hologram ends.

Back on the CRSC mothership, Dr. Wining orders, “I want every missile we have fired at the Primate 1.” The mothership fires at Primate 1, but, unknown to Dr, Wining,  Wingy has made Primate 1 bulletproof. The missiles bounce off Primate 1 and head back towards the mothership.

Suddenly Dr. Wining appears again on the hologram and is yelling, “What are you doing?” Wingy smiles and says, ‘We are the crew of Primate 1, Goodbye Dr. Wining!” And those were the last words that Dr. Wining and the CRSC staff ever heard as their own missiles hit their mothership.

Back on Primate 1, Wingy says,  “We did it!  But where is Nartha?” Hangy said,  “Let’s not think about her for now. We accomplished our goal and defeated the CRSC.” Alpha Python says, “What do we do now?” Smorgas replies, “Lay low, I guess. Costa Rica is a beautiful place so we could go there, now that CRSC is gone.” Hangy spoke up, “I know some nice people who live in Costa Rica. “ Wingy added,  “I don’t need to make new friends, I have you guys.” And Alpha Python said, “I think I will like like Costa Rica.” Wingy said,  “So, Costa Rica it is, then.”

Two months later, the four friends, Wingy, Smorgas, Hangy, and Alpha Python are all living together on Primate 1. They hear a knock on the door.

Wingy said,  “Come in.” A hooded monkey walks in and says, “I heard what you did with the CRSC. The world needs people like you. I suppose you have heard about Dr. Piggy’s Unisailor invention? “ Smorgas replies, “Yes we have.” The monkey continues, “Dr. Piggy entrusted me with the other Unisailor card and I want to use it to build a team of heroes around the Universe.” The Monkey takes off his hood and says, “My name is Alex.  I go by Power Monkey!”

Wingy says, I am Wingy and these are my friends. If the Universe, or other dimensions, need help, they can have it. Who are we? The Unisailors!”

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